I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
