On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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