real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
