Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
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