Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
