The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize
