i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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