I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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