one might say we're banned from that church
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
