Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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