I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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