She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
