Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
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