super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
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