i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
