I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Randomize
