woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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