Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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