took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize
