Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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