people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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