Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
