is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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