Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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