jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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