sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize
