they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
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