I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize
