i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
I think i got beer on your cat.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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