but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
and she was petting her beer can
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
