I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
