If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
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