He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
