he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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