he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
