You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Randomize
