Apparently you make a good broom.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
