Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize