what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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