Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
We have started to decorate penises.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
