jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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