Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
