Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Randomize
