i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Operation Purity has been aborted
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
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