wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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