this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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