home. puking in laundry basket.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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