Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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