I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
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