I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Randomize
