i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Boobs are out for the taking
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
